Catholic Church Reverses Stance on Birth Control Following News of Snooki's Pregnancy

Last week's Catholic bishops have sparred President Obama during the contentious issue of birth control, as they may consider the issue of religious freedom. Mandatory that organizations do not think the fund for the prevention, they argue, to suppress those freedoms. While President Obama bowed to pressure and released religious employers such as hospitals and universities, the Catholic Bishops Conference continue to protest that the exemption did not go far enough to protect religious rights. "We have to increase for the Lord calls," said Dick Bishop milling of San Narciso County Diocese. "We need to increase our numbers. At this point, the question of the competition. We do crazy jumps on board Fred Phelps, End Timers still clinging to hopes of Harold Camping, celebrities running with Scientology and the Kabbalah, and as a gazillion Muslims to fight. We need babies. Catholic babies." The anti-contraception position within the church has become so critical that the priest was ex-communicated in January to family counseling rhythm method. "It is still in the birth rate," Reamer said. Amazingly, however, the hard-line supporters of the Catholic Church made a rare U-turn on Wednesday with the Vatican to the Pope's Regulation by striking down all the previous judgments against contraceptive devices and practices.

Spokesman in Rome said the decision was taken by the church officials know about Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi pregnancy. Snooki is a 24-year-old star of the reality television series "Jersey Shores". He is a multi-millionaire, who enjoys the indiscriminate, unprotected sex and urination in public places. He is believed to be three months pregnant. Although the Council does not believe the Pope's Snooki is to transport the anti-Christ, they are afraid of his descendants may have something unpleasant and harmful to society. Some insiders consider the situation so dire that the church could consider relaxing its opposition to a pro-choice legislation.
 
"This is a really grumpy day," Father Preternature told the church of San Narciso only the Catholic Church. "They say the Lord giveth and the Lord takes away. That when the door closes, a window will open. But learn Snooki pregnancy same day as the Davy Jones' sudden death, it seems to me that sometimes the Lord just close the doors and hits the windows and take off. Two tragedies today, and I am struggling to understand what is worse. "